Item No. <Description> Price
| Mr. Happy | |
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Mr. Happy, or as he is known in Firmwood Falls, Herr Happy, is the master of his own domain. How do I love thee? Let me count the ways: petting the porpoise, thumping the dummy, waxing the wire, choking the chicken, pulling the pud, spanking the monkey, riding the rail, flogging the flounder, greasing the pole, squeezing the tube from the middle, making five-fingered love, beating the bishop, charming the one-eyed snake, cuffing the carrot, doin' the five-knuckle shuffle, playing pocket pool, and our personal favorite, quality time with Big Bob and the twins. These are the things that come to mind when Mr. Happy lets his fingers do the walking. That's why we have named him the Goodwill Ambassador of Firmwood Falls. Some people find sorrow in solitude. For Mr. Happy・ it's a party waiting to happen. You can find him on any evening curled up in front of the fireplace with a good book, a glass of wine, a fine cigar, and a supersized bottle of hand cream. Ah, the simple pleasures of life. We salute you Mr. Happy・ but let's not shake hands. We know where they've been. Give Mr. Happy・to the movers and shakers in your life and tell them to have a nice day or a pleasant evening. Every time they play with Mr. Happy・ they'll be thinking of you. |
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P001 <Mr. Happy> \3,200
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Obsceniesのメインキャラクター且つ一番の人気者ミスター・ハッピー！ 最初はちょっと恥ずかしいかも？でも、よく見るととてもキュートです♪握り心地もよく（？）エアロのライブにはこれをペンライト代わりに振ってみてもいいかも？（笑）身長は約25cmです。Mr.Happy makes you HAPPY! |
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4322 <Mr. Happy - Autographed>
\6,200
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トム・ハミルトンの直筆サイン入りの限定品もあります。＜直筆サイン入り証明書付＞ |
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| Scrotilla The Hun | |
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Bounding from the depths of the past comes one of the most catastrophically carnal characters of ancient history. This rampaging invader parted the thighs of early European history like no other. He sits firmly in the saddle of the ages, an upright portrait of the ambition of manhood. Scrotilla never abandoned his compulsion to dip his helmet into battle wherever and whenever he detected the opportunity - generally once, maybe twice a day. This great lover of architecture was once riding his mount near the spectacular Cathedral of Cologne when he heard someone cry: "What an erection!" With a knowing smile he thrust himself into the faraway fields of foreign-ication. This Hun was never less than ready for the moist heat of engagement. His Hun-dreds of offspring hint at what could have been a one-man population explosion were it not for his fastidious use of a brain bucket, ribbed, flavored and extra thin for maximum impact. Scrotilla is a rough and ready pal for your damsel in distress or your leather-clad friends. Be careful in his presence, though, for he has been known to attack from the rear and send his victims packing. He's a great way to show your appreciation for anyone who has faced a cynical mob of venture capitalists or a surly Frenchman. Either way, you'll get the punishment you crave. |
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P003 <Scrotilla the Hun> \3,200
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ハンさんはどこの国の方なんでしょうか？？？ Mr.Happy の別バージョン。勇ましいバイキング姿です・・。サイズはMr.Happyと同サイズです。 |
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4323 <Scrotilla the Hun - Autographed>
\6,200
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トム・ハミルトンの直筆サイン入りの限定品もあります。＜直筆サイン入り証明書付＞ |
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| Penisaurus | |
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Lots and lots of years ago, when Joan Rivers was nice, dinosaurs ruled the earth. The gentle Brontosaurus lolled peacefully the shallow marshes. She shared the landscape with the ferocious Penisaurus Rex. The combination of speed, crushing jaws, razor-sharp teeth and a cold sore the size of a Condor made him the most feared predator of his time. While P-Rex gorged, prehistoric fish crawled up from the sea, slithered across the land and slowly evolved into critics, televangelists, presidential candidates and then, in some cases, back to slithering again. The feared pterodactyl swooped out of the sky on its unsuspecting prey. Clutching its quaking quarry in its beak, the pterodactyl ripped the poor creature apart while still alive. Today's descendent of the pterodactyl is of course the divorce attorney. All of these fearsome beasts had two things in common: great size and strength and stunningly small brains. All except the mighty Penisaurus. If you accept the axiom that "his brains are in his d***," then this guy was the genius of the Jurassic. While the storm of evolution raged around him, Penisaurus・banged his way through the ages. He survived all of it: meteorites, volcanoes, icebergs, Aaron Spelling's Titans, all by virtue of his unquenchable horniness. He banged anything that would move and some that didn't. More than one frigid Mastodon received a back-door delivery he wasn't expecting. Here once again we give you, The Beast. Heads up and behold, the mighty Penisaurus・in all his glory. Roaaaar! No flash photography, please. |
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P004 <Penisaurus> \3,200
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名前からしてもズバリそのもの感は否めませんが・・・ 名前はずばりそのもの！ですが、案外愛嬌のある顔をしていて、お部屋に置いても違和感なさそう♪こちらもサイズはMr.Happyと同サイズです。 |
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4324 <Penisaurus - Autographed>
\6,200
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トム・ハミルトンの直筆サイン入りの限定品もあります。＜直筆サイン入り証明書付＞ |
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| Robin Red Breasts | |
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A special review by our in-house breast man, Jim Jugworth. "Dang, I have to believe that whoever wrote that song about the Red, Red Robin had this lovely lady in mind. If birds of a feather really do flock together, then please point the way to this groovy chick's watering hole, I wanna flock too. I'll tell you, I was a big fan of the 'Titwillow' till this chick came along, why she'd give any pecker a woody. If being in love is wrong, I don't want to be right. She's just a chick who can't say nyet. She's the minstrel of mammaries・he siren of silicone. It may take a tough man to make a tender chicken, but for knockers like these you need a surgeon. One song she doesn't sing is "Natural Woman" but who cares. They are perky, plush, and pulchritudinous. Her brazen bosoms have been amplified to yum yum babelicious size. I've been told she's pigeon toed, but I for one have never looked down that far. It doesn't take a pop-up thermometer to know these breasts are done. She's the empress of implants, the babe of the birdbath! Yesssssssssssssssssssss. Oh, sweet bird of youth!" Why not start your "Obscenie・Collection" with Robin. Think of her as two for the price of one. Robin Red Breasts・makes a great gift for the breast lover in your life. |
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P002 <Robin Red Breasts> \3,200
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キャラクターの中では一番恥ずかしくない・・・かな？？？ オブ唯一の女性キャラです。色っぽいですぅ〜♪巨乳好きの彼、男友達へのプレゼントに喜ばれます・・・？身長は約24cmです。 |
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4325 <Robin Red Breasts - Autographed>
\6,200
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トム・ハミルトンの直筆サイン入りの限定品もあります。＜直筆サイン入り証明書付＞ |
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| Mr. and Mrs. Dingle | |
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Decorating for the holidays? What seasonal celebration would be complete without this charming and earthy presentation of Mr. and Mrs. Kris Dingle? Hanging the Dingles on the tree or fireplace mantle guarantees good cheer for friends and family alike. Use this limited edition Obscenies collectible in place of Mistletoe. You'll get a hell of a lot more than a kiss. Psst..We'll let you in on a little secret. Every time the bell rings a couple of angels are getting busy. Order now because supplies are limited. We swear! |
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P006 <Mr. & Mrs. Kris Dingle>
\3,200
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クリスマスシーズンのデコレーション用にいかがでしょうか？？？ 限定商品です。 |
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4326 <Mr. and Mrs. Dingle - Autographed>
\6,200
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トム・ハミルトンの直筆サイン入りの限定品もあります。 |
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